I guess its MLC-new need advice 6 months in

[25yearsmlc]

as we have said before

they rewrite history b/c they are justifying their actions. They will vilify those who guilt them.


That does not make ALL their views inaccurate b/c some truth may exist in them

and we may well have missed some things. We're not perfect either.

And we have our own bias too.

But by and large a man who leaves his family

and who was once a loved member, more or less,

has a lot of "splainin' to do!"

So he begins that "splainin'" with himself,

and goes on to tell YOU all the things he's "glad he's out of!"

You can only take so much before you're going to want to react.

If it stings, as PEI says, take a look. Own your part, learn from it, and MOVE ON...

if it's just BS (and at some level you'll often just 'know' it is)

LET IT GO...

otherwise

it's like the time I let a nutty homeless guy who lived on a grill, who did not know me at all,

but hated something about me harrass and hound me.

He'd yell the most vulgar things my way and

I recall wondering if I'd worn something ugly or looked like someone mean in his life..."wth?"

I literally had no idea who he was (i.e., he was not a former client of mine from court)

but I let his "opinion" of me affect me until one day when my boss heard him yelling at me as I left court.

Then my boss made some funny remark about how that "must be your old bf"...and it hit me that this homeless guy living on a grill, had NO idea who I was

and his "data about me, was not real"...so it did not matter...at all.


Why on earth had I wasted a single brain cell caring or wondering what this guy thought of me?

He might have had some broken synapses, or a chemical imbalance, or a head trauma

NONE OF WHICH HAD TO DO WITH ME....

Similarly, your h's bias about things right now, makes his

"data" NOT REAL and

so it cannot matter so much to you. You have to let it roll off your back.