That is the root of the problem. IMHO, there is a strong possibility she has turned to somebody else to meet her emotional needs.
I hear a lot of excuses regarding the phone. Get a new number..or better yet, another cheap phone where you pay up front for xx amount of hours, and have that one for your mother only! And trust me....I really do understand about sick family members. I just want you to see your own weakness and how you live for the next TM from your WAW.
Yes, the book suggests that you only answer some of the calls. However, you can't handle "some of them" right now. You have to go dark and forcus on getting stronger and a lot of self-improment before having contact again.
Quote:
I've never been a go out and party type person but I really like going to movies.
Do you realize how many times you have brought up the fact that you (and your W) never went out? You do not accept the fact that it is important for a couple to go out and get away from the daily routine and sitting at home every night. But, now you are alone and I'm telling you that unless you make some big 180's, your M will not make it. That is what a 180 is all about! You do things that are not the "usual". I think you will be seen as a pretty dull person, if you don't go this.
You are making another excuse about your BIL. You want to use him to connect with his sister. At first, I thought he might actually care what she does, but he's made it clear that as long as she pays rent, she can do whatever. He may be the only "friend" you think you have, but that is just more results of you not having a life! The only reason you include him is b/c of her being related.
Stop making excuses, and stop being a couch potato and get out and go places that people occupy. You might make a new friend that is actually healthy for you.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
