Maybe you screwed up - so, what can you take from it?
What did you do that didn't really reflect the kind of person you really want to be?
It sounds like you regret continuing the argument beyond just saying something about it. Could you have waited to say something about it later?
There is obviously a bunch of mixed motivations at play here for both of you, and I think that its making it hard for either of you to 'fight fair.' I don't believe you should be expecting your W to take the initiative on this one, as you are the one on this forum - but look into how to fight fair. Look into how to listen actively. I think these would really help you to resolve these things better.
What is it about what your W said that might be true? Or, how could she be thinking it was true? Is there something you might do differently in order to convey to her that her perspective isn't accurate? Notice I said DO differently. Don't bother arguing it with her.
She complains about being stuck in the muck - can't you get yourself out of that w/o her help? Its probably going to be good for you no matter what, and it might show your W a possibility that right now, she is too myopic to see.
M: 32 W: 29 T: 9 Years M: 4 Years I hit rock bottom: 2/11 PA admitted: 4/11 WAW: 5/11 D filed: 6/11 now: Patience, wisdom, and growth - hopefully.
