"When we were arguing earlier she said she wasn't willing to work on it and she doesn't want to fix it. blah blah blah."

Blah blah blah? Hollowed, you might want to put the cynicism aside while you are in the middle of this, even if it's just posting here. Your W may be saying a lot of things that make no sense or that you've heard before, but somewhere in her words are clues to her perception of why your M is on the rocks.

Minimal or no communication might be a good idea now; gives both of you a chance to step back from each other.

H 56
W 48
D27,S21
SS25
SS22 Severely autistic
M(#2 for both) 9 1/2 yrs.
"I've never loved you" 3/7/2011
Separated 8/7/2011
BITS