New - HELP! Tried the 180/Last Resort & Failed

[AloneAt35]

Wait a minute, 25years, I re-read your last post for the zillionth time and now I see more clearly. The thing that can attract ex-P isn't that I have a nice house (I don't), or a car of my own, his children, or even much of a social life (yet)...its that I simply WON'T need him anymore (or, more realistically, I'll appear not to need him.)

I used to need him for everything. When I was out of town he came by the house to get some of his stuff and he was surprised and complimentary that I planted the garden without him...since I no longer have to feed him, I guess he thought I'd just let it grow weeds - or he thought I'd be too depressed or helpless to do it without him. I hated every second of planting that garden without him (we always did it together), but I forced myself to do it as part of my GAL - life was going to go on while he was wooing and pining and crying over OW and completely AWOL. And he noticed, it was one of the few things he actually noticed - it made him say that living there "had been fun". Too bad the house is being sold and I won't see much of a harvest. Still, it surprised him.

Maybe my strategy should be to surprise him as much as possible with the things I am doing - even if they aren't fun or pleasant things, they are things I am doing by myself.