My wife and I have been physically/sexually separated for 7+ years, but still live together (here in Sweden) for the sake of the kids, and because we like the house. She had an affair 5 years ago, but now there is nothing on either part, again for the sake of the kids.
We had a talk this morning, where she said that marrying me was a mistake (I was a 'project' for her, but now she realizes that you can't change people), that buying our fixer upper house was a mistake (she does 90% of the fixing), and that I am not assertive enough (I am not assertive), without an inner person.
She thinks we should split up in about 2 years, when our daughter will begin high school. She also thinks marriages should last maybe 5-10 years only. Seeking professional help is out of the question for her (she is proud, strong and does not want to depend on anyone).
What am I to do? I love her and the kids, but could also imagine moving to another country. Divorcing now would have the advantage of reducing what I need to pay her in social security later. We could still live together even though we are divorced (for the kids again). All this cold rejection is painful.
From a sunny Sweden -
LuckyLuke
53, married 25 years, separated 7, 2 kids: 13 and 17
M58, xW54 S22, D18 M 1984, D 2016 Living a new life.
