It's also part of the package of reconcilation with your wife. And though you may forgive her, if she's not sorry, if she's witholding information, if she's not really trying to re-engage you, then, perhaps, you guys will be stuck in limbo.
A good pro-marriage therapist may help you to open your hearts to each other, have compassion for each other and when that's establshed, she can feel safe enough to share the gory details, look you in the eye, admit what she did was wrong and ask for your forgiveness.
