Yes, by most accounts I did treat her well. Spoiler her rotten in fact. But what she really craved was Quality Time, and while we spent a lot of time together, I was generally self-centered about my own problems. I really did not listen to her closely and try to understand her problems and fears for her future. She was quiet about it, but that's why we must listen carefully. If I had, she might have entered her MLC and steered it in a much more positive direction. Instead, she found a sympathetic ear with OM and so I must accept the error of my ways and my contribution to her MLC.
Yes things do change. We can effect that change with our own behaviour. Both in good and bad ways. It is a very powerful concept once you become aware of it. No matter what / where my W ends of going, if she is willing (and I believe she is), WE will make the best of our new relationship. She will eventually move on from her current OM, as even she admits it is temporary and all she craves is life as a single, indepedent woman. I believe she understands he is unhealthy for the kids as their R is what ruined our marraige and the kids will never forget that. When and if she finds someone new, her life and that with her daughters will be much healthier. Would love to think she will view me in a new light one day, so who knows, maybe one day we may come back together. Stranger things have happened. If not, then not. I will have no regrets.
While getting out in the world is fun and necessary, dating is not on my horizon for the foreseeable future. My mind is not in it, and I don't think it would be good for my kids either. Don't need both parents going sideways. However, just being out and about, wine tasting, getting glances from the opposite sex, is very healthy indeed and I enjoyed it thoroughly. I will do more of this as it is important to start my journey to my new life. Slow, but easy is the plan.
