Just before I woke up this morning, I had a sexual dream about STBX. That hasn't happened in a long time. It was so real and made me so sad. Sundays are always tough for me, because that used to be the day the family had together. I told the kids last night that I want to focus more on the 3 of us being a family and making things better at home. I have been so consumed by my pain and anger that I have not done a great job of being a dad.
Within a couple of months our divorce will be done and STBX will be living with OM. All the years I have been here I never believed this is how it would end. I always thought it was going to work out. Even as things continued to progress towards divorce, I never gave up all hope. I am now making myself do that and accepting reality.
This forum has been a saving grace to me. So many strangers supported me and gave me advice. I am truly thankful for those of you who cared and feel for every one of you going through this terrible thing.
