It's well after 1 am and I can't sleep. I have no idea what is going on.
One of my friends ran into H earlier this week and he was with the OW that he is staying with. This OW is a coworker of his, she is significantly older than him, and he has always had a lot of female friends. As much as I'd like to think that H would be unfaithful while we are apart (we had discussed specifically not dating other people) It still creeps into my head from time to time. I remind myself that if he is #1-there is nothing I can do about it anyway & #2-that would be a mistake on his part, and it is by no means a reflection of me.
You know, when H first left, I beat myself up emotionally. I blamed myself for all of our problems in the M, and truly felt like I was a woman not worth loving. I am so thankful that I have worked through that and realized that not everything is my fault, and I am a great person.
"Everyone you meet has baggage. Find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack." ¤Formerly DelinquentGurl¤
I understand the feeling DG, 2am (almost 3) and I'm not sleeping either. Ugh.
I beat myself up too, but through all of this I finally learned how to forgive myself and move on from my mistakes. Not sure if W knows how to do that yet.
You are a wonderful person DG, as am I. It's really a shame our respective S don't know that!
Me 43 W 38 M 5 T 7 SD20 S15, S13 with 1st W ILYBNILWY June 2010 Separation/Bomb July 2010 Divorce Feb 8, 2011
don't know where you are in terms of the R, but here's a thought.
You could send some flowers (not red roses)
and a card that says "It's still worth remembering"
and if you have kids, express gratitude that the m produced them.
just a thought. How are you feeling these days GAL?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
I had a great day today! I spent it with both of my boys. Parents of teenagers, you know how rare those times can be. We cleaned out the garage together, got a bunch of stuff together to donate to Goodwill. Stopped by my parents, hit up some garage sales, and treated them both to lunch.
When we got home, my S15 & I rearranged the cupboards in the kitchen. I think it was my way of making this place a little more "me" rather than us.
We grilled with friends tonight, and then came home and walked with a friend.
Tomorrow we have plans to BBQ with some other friends, and I am looking forward to it.
Today I GAL 150%!!!
"Everyone you meet has baggage. Find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack." ¤Formerly DelinquentGurl¤
It does feel good. I always have my H in the back of my mind though, but I think that is normal.
I have been "dark" from H for 4 days now. Some moments I find it difficult, while others it doesn't seem to bother me as much. Maybe if he were trying to contact me that would be a different story. I miss him terribly, but I know I need to do this if I am ever going to get used to life without him.
"Everyone you meet has baggage. Find someone who loves you enough to help you unpack." ¤Formerly DelinquentGurl¤
Sounds like a great day DG!! Feels good to have days like that.
I feel exactly the same some moments are difficult and others are easier. My H is still in the house and I wonder if it would be easier if he was gone not sure.
