My Final Chapter

[Sad_but_happy]

I agree 2step with almost everything you said.


And I agree with most of what 25 said as well. Here is where I disagree.

"I wonder about your comment re:how unforgivable her "stringing you along" was...

I offer a comment and a question.

My comment is that you are doing some serious mind reading/characterization of her behavior"



All this about mind reading can be accurate, but let's not again ALWAYS look at it that way. She WAS stringing him along. And it's not always mind reading. How about intuition. A sense that something is not right. This is why I get all worked up at the view of the LBS. Again the LBS must look at the WAS differently. WE must give THEM the benefit of the doubt.




"which I am not sure is accurate or fair."


And there it is again... Really? 2step isn't being fair? To this I call foul! Absolute BS. and it AGAIN looks at the LBS as the person not being "fair". Again we bash the LBS no matter how much he/she improves and how much he/she does.




"My Question is, even assuming you are right, why is that so "unforgivable"?

You can't believe she could be confused, retaining deep feelings for you while also thinking perhaps too much water had gone over the bridge?

Dare I ask, So what if she wanted to hedge her bets?

Is the "unforgivable" part of this, that you believed her to be working on YOU as a couple, while instead she was also pursuing OM and doing some comparison shopping?"


With this comment I say that the moral compass of our society is doomed.


"Hedging her bets"?.........

"Comparison shopping"?........


PLEASE MAKE THE MADNESS STOP... She was a MARRIED WOMAN... She used 2step. She played with his emotions.


THAT in my opinion is an unforgivable act. That does not mean you can't forgive the person. But the act itself IS unforgivable.


And AGAIN we hold up the WAS in a higher regard and tell the LBS that the WAS did little wrong.



We can ALWAYS find someone "better" or "sweeter" or "nicer" or "prettier" or "richer"... We could always keep "trading up". Our spouses may not be the BEST for us. There are millions of people that may be better for us. There are no "soul mates".

But does that mean we should?

Does that mean we should "shop" until the next best thing comes along?



Listen, I have no problem taking my lumps for my hard line approach. I have no problem facing the firing squad.


But I do take issue with the constant bashing of the LBS.


I agree that 2step will be happier because of this journey. And he will find a woman that values him and will stay with him during the "bad" times. Because that's what we are SUPPOSED to do. "For better or worse"...

Because window shopping is not an option...