Changing things up. It's been my habit to answer the phone and then hand it off to my kids when H. calls. I'm not doing that or even bothering to purposefully wish him a goodnight anymore. I care, but a lot less as the months pass.
It's hard to maintain any feelings for a man that dumped you, broke your heart and now treats you like detritus. I guess because I finally realise I don't rate a passing thought, or well wish, I'm not putting any energy in his direction or trying anymore. Why do it? Nothing I do or say, think or feel really makes a dent in his behaviour or changes my situation.
I am beginning to accept that I am pretty much on my own, raising my kids, ( and I say mine because they spend the most time with me). I get to do the hard work and reap the rewards of it too. I'm getting my behind out there and finding that I have a lot going for me. It feels really good.
BITS Me-51, WAS-52 Kids 2 M-26yrs, H.left 2009, 2 more Bomb drops, Reconnection spring 2013 Change is inevitable, personal growth is a choice. Love is a action and choice you make, every day.
