Originally Posted By: ninelives
It really is time to let go of the rope and do things for ourselves for our kids. Ii REALLY IS. ITS time to let go of the rope REAL REAL.


This is the tough part. I DO things for myself and my D. My biggest problem is my MIND. This is the part I have had a hard time controlling. Controlling actions is one thing, controlling what a philosopher once described as a "drunkin monkey" (the human mind) is another.

I think the most I can offer right now is becoming more mindful of my thoughts. Mindfulness is something I have been working on, but it is not easy.

A general definition:

a kind of nonelaborative, nonjudgmental, present-centered awareness in which each thought, feeling, or sensation that arises in the attentional field is acknowledged and accepted as it is

Basically, at least for me, I think of it this way. I WILL have negative thoughts. I WILL have thoughts that do not benefit my goal and where I want to go. However, if I am mindful of my thoughts, I can step back from them, accept them for what they are, and continue to move forward. In other words, these thoughts will not keep me stuck.

Of course, with this said, I do also believe we can reduce our negative thoughts through our actions. GAL, DOING things, helps to keep the mind focus on the current activity.

At the end of the day, sadly, I think time will be the ultimate factor in actually reducing the frequency and intensity of these thoughts.


BITS

Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.