D1: Apart from the kids, your W's attitude and "feel" of communications is very close to what I'm getting. Loads of sympathy from this side; I was likewise Very Much Surprised--and like you (and so many others) tried the wrong things.
My W is filing soon (this week probably). Hope you have better luck than I seem to be having, but I sympathize mightily.
Thanks "os" I don't believe in accidents and am very grateful for finding this site. I've learned and continue to learn (daily) from past mistakes and others' too and how to keep movin' forward. This forum is soo much better than counseling at least for me. Mainly because people here actually have been through or are going through similar tough times. Birds of a feather...
GALin' went to dinner with cousins last night and laughed for hours. Gym this morning (boy that felt good) and off to visit more family tonight. Picking up all the kids tomorrow for Father's Day for fun at a waterpark (my present from them) Now, how to by mysterious/180 for the pick-up, hmm..
Now, how to by mysterious/180 for the pick-up, hmm..
It really isn't that hard. Your part is to look good enough that it takes her breath away. Add a sexy smile on top of a big serving of old fashion charm, and she'll be wilting. Of course, she doesn't intend for you to know how you affect her, but that's okay, just keep being confident.
The mystery part is simply not telling her everything you do. Give vague answers. Don't lie. If you have no place to go and have to ride around...then tell her you went riding around......or went to the mall looking. The point is to have that secret, confident, suggestive smile that will cause her to wonder.
Pick the kids up and have a fun attitude. Don't hang around. Get them and get out as quickly as you can. That's important. That tells her that you really are getting a life and don't have time to stick around to see what kind of mood she's in or engage in conversation, KWIM? As you ride away into the sunset, having a great time with her kids, it should hit her a little bit that she's not a part of that. However, don't put all your eggs into that basket. She will have to experience this several times.
BTW, don't be surprised if she TM's you while you and kids are out together. Couples use their kids as a contact excuse.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Now that is very helpful, thank you! Your suggestions add sizzle to the steak so to speak. Just thinking about what you said puts me in a confident mood. Good stuff.
You know those "tolls" they take to see what women find the most attractive in a man? If memory serves, it is usually confidence close to the top of that list.
For the most part, I think it has to be that inner, true, self-confidence and not that "showy" stuff. Occasionally, a man might have to pretend he's more confident than he really feels, but what really turns most women off (I think) is the type who brags to make himself look good.
A word of caution, do not expect anything from her. Never go expecting a response from her. If you do, you'll be setting yourself up for disappointment. Don't try to to read any meaning into whatever she says or does, okay?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
For the most part, I think it has to be that inner, true, self-confidence and not that "showy" stuff.
Right. It's a fine line between being happy with who you are and braggadocio and arrogance. The last two are turn offs.
BITS Me-51, WAS-52 Kids 2 M-26yrs, H.left 2009, 2 more Bomb drops, Reconnection spring 2013 Change is inevitable, personal growth is a choice. Love is a action and choice you make, every day.
Got it! OK, Awesome day at the waterpark with the kids..soo fun. At pick up, I was calm, confident, friendly and ready to go. W asked to have the kids, dog(miss him too) and I, to sit on the lawn for a photo. I obliged. Had the kids all day and dropped off in the evening. They wanted to stay with me..which makes me feel good/sad simultaneously. My son, would NOT let go of me and just hugged and clenched on to me for dear life(he's 3). lOVE those kids with every fiber of my being.
Thanked them all for a great Father's day, includeing W for helping coordninate the w.park. Again, wife tried to engage in conversation as we were parting and I was nice, but short. While literally pulling out of the drive she said she would email a list of the kids summer activities per my request. Thanked her as I was rolling out. Proud of my confident, non-spiteful attitude around W today. I felt just "good." Need to keep it up this week. Here's to GALing!
Thanks! Today, wife emailed three times one including the aforementioned photo. Haven't replied but will for the one regarding the kids. Very interesting..this going dark.
