My wife is contemplating divorce and obviously I don't want it. She's bi polar and isn't on any medication because the meds scare her because she feels they make her worse. We haven't been fighting or anything is what makes a lot of this confusing. Even now she acts like everything is fine and when asking her why it seems so easy for her she says she shut herself down emotionally. I've suggested marriage counseling and she has shot that idea down saying she's changed in the past couple of years and marriage is no longer what she wants. We don't have any kids thankfully that have to be dragged through this.
Monday she came to me and said she was needing space because she feels suffocated. She said she wants to be able to spend more time with her friend. I've never had a problem with her going to visit her friend. Only problem I have with it is they drink and then my wife stays at her place all night because she can't drive drunk obviously. I even offered to drop her off and pick her back up as a compromise. Anyways she said she needed space but didn't want to separate and wasn't thinking about divorce. So I started doing my own thing a little bit and letting her have some space. Yesterday she comes home from work and says she talked with her brother and she is moving in with him and his wife and is sure she wants a divorce but is going to give it a little time first. Seemed a pretty big extreme to me to go from not wanting to separate or anything to wanting to divorce all in 4 days. her only reasoning she gives me is that she misses being single and doing what she wants to do without the responsibility of having to tell anyone what's going on. I asked her what I'm supposed to be doing here and she said moving on. Don't know if she means that or not.
I'm pretty close to her brother and he says he's pretty sure there isn't another guy involved in this but if he finds out otherwise he will let me know. So she packed up some clothes and went to his place last night. He's also thinking about divorcing his wife. He said he thinks in a few weeks she will want to come back.
She was texting me last night to tell me that she still had my ipod in her bag and that lead into a conversation of her telling me I'm her best friend and she doesn't want to lose me altogether. I didn't really have anything to say to that.
it just seems weird to me to leave a husband that loves her,a home,car and a bed to go live with her brother and having to have someone she works with pick her up and sleeping on his couch in the basement. She left the car with me because my name is the only one on the loan and she can't keep up with payments on it which also puts me in a bind because I don't have the money to pay for 2 cars,rent,food and utilities. So that left me today with having to go look for a part-time job also.
Do I just not text her and let her come to me? It feels odd to me to do nothing at all but I feel helpless in this situation. She is supposed to be coming over this weekend to pack up her stuff. I really hate being here it just seems so lonely and depressing waiting for her to walk through the door and jump on me to give me a hug knowing she's not going to. I don't really have anywhere else to go I don't have any friends around here and I've never really been a social butterfly. Any suggestions on what I can do to prevent this divorce from happening? thank you
