ooohweee what'sup wit that

[25yearsmlc]

forgive me for this comment b/c

I had a brilliant AND hilariously witty,

long post that just got deleted...

probably by my feeble computer skills and the lateness of the hour

so will post that treatise later...

but the misdemeanor/felony line hit me. It's often accurate. Great analogy.


EXCEPT a few m's here, had some real "marriage Felons" who were LBSers, who have spouses that want out

& to the "felon", ironically, the spouse wanting out, is the "real" felon!


I say, not so fast...

If the WAS commits what SEEMS like a felony or serious misdemeanor

but when


you learn the real history of the m,

without the wounded ego of the LBSer clouding things & viewing it w/that lens


You see things differently...and roles can reverse, or should...


(No hidden meaning meant for you 2step, or faith),

just saying I've seen it around, and

if the shoe fits...

a single "first offense," even of a "Felony" can sometimes be seen in a very different light


when the LBSer refuses to take a brave honest look at their YEARS of behavior

("repeat offenses" over years, with plenty of warnings)

that might well

have pushed their WAS out the door....well

when I hear the LBSer "vent" here, about how wrong the WAS is,

I see little hope for the m,


Based on what I see or hear from these "wronged LBSers" who overlook or gloss over their true role in what happened,

I see hope and happiness ahead for the one walking out...

any LBSer who says they were great spouses, AND have "no regrets" about how they treated their WAS...

has had one painful experience, that taught them nothing. What a waste.


You two are so fortunate in that you know you are better men for this.


Here's the deal...

If your w's never return, they'll always wonder if your changes lasted/were real

and if so, whether they would have lasted & been real for them

and if so, they will wonder about & mourn what they lost...

they'll second guess their choices,

every time something in their new

wonderful life, goes wrong

every time a holiday comes around, or a memory resurfaces, they will wonder.

When things go well for them,

they'll wonder if that could have happened anyhow,[i] with their original families...[/i]

Whereas the LBSer who grows, & owns their ROLE in the problems & learned from them,

MUST make the best of the situation, for they had no choice in the matter.


Those LBSers lives improve.
Those LBSers won't wonder or look over their shoulder.

The WAS always will...