Sounds like your wife enjoys drama, but then again, she is in an MLC and probably trying to figure out herself. My advice to you is to figure out her languages of love (sounds like you have) and make sure that you make her feel loved multiple times each an every day. I do that for my wife and she enjoys feeling so loved and cherished. She knows and has said that there probably isn't anyone who would every make her feel like that.
Schnarch should be a real eye opening experience for your wife and challenge her self-image. I really wouldn't be surprised if she wants as some point to close Pandora's box on open marriage and bisexuality. Hopefully, she will use some of the principals of managing change in marriage to help her come to grips with herself and come out the end as a mature woman who wants to be your wife.
If she were my wife and wanted to explore those feelings (which I think is playing with fire), I would go to a legitimate spa and get a couples massage where two women massaged us while we were in the same room. That way it would be "sex-like" but not involve actual sex with others.
Wait till you get to the section in PM on doing and being done. My wife has "done" me a few times and they have all been earth shaking & memorable.
Remember that you can self-soothe and change yourself for better by focusing on the best of your emotions, character and morals. I really think that Schnarch is right about marriage (a long term multi-decade marriage) being hard work, but if done right, incredibly rewarding.
Schnarch was too intense for my wife (and some parts for me). I wish you the best of luck. Focus on your GAL, as you really need to center yourself and find yourself, especially if you are doing PM.
>43 years of marriage--My wife and I are now closer than we have been in decades. I believe that my SSM is over.
