W and I have been married close to 11 years. Last summer she had an EA that turned into a PA. I immediately felt betrayed and angry but did the usual crying, begging, and pleading.
She had made plans for a weekend getaway with OM and told her if she did and followed through then I would file, which I did. Then I discovered the book and the site and decided I want to save my M. DB'b my a$$ off and did a complete 180 from the H I was which she was unhappy with. Last week my IC even mentioned that in her 25 years of C that she has never seen someone that has done the complete 180 like I have.
In December my W mentioned that she wants to work on the M and we started MC. I heard her complaints which I knew what they were and had already corrected most of them.
Things were well for a while. And we withdrew the D. The other day she mentioned if I was happy the way things were going. I told her yes but I would like to do some more things together just the two of us. She agreed and followed up with a text that she loves me.
Her 40th bday is coming up and I was looking into a weekend getaway for the two of us. Then her friend mentioned a surprise party and I told this friend that she was adament that this is not what she wants. She insisted that she wanted to give her one so instead of it just coming from this friend I offered to assist so it looks like it came from the kids and I as well. This morning she found out about it and kind of lost it. Saying that this is not what she wanted and that I always do what I want to do. I explaind it wasn't my idea but if this frind was going to do it that I wanted the kids and I to help. After much arguing she tells me that she's been trying but doesn't feel she can love me the way I deserve to be loved by a wife. She was already planning on taking the kids out for the day so instead of talking about the R I walked away and let her leave.
I've been reading these boards for a while and was hoping to get some much needed advice from the wise people here. How can she tell me she's happy with me one day and then a few days later tell me she can't love my like a real W can? I'm so confused.
There is a difference between knowing the path & walking the path. – Morpheus
