If I were to introduce a wife to things, the order would be Chapman's 5 languages of love, then MWD's SSM, and only much later PM after I knew she was really dedicated to improvement.
But you have surprised me with your skills so far. Go for it, if it is what you want.
PM has some really interesting concepts. Schnarch likes to say that in marriage there is a high and low desire partner for everything, from sex, to ice cream, to number of children and that the successful marriage involves compromising and communitcating on all of those mixed desire levels. I feel he correctly points out that there is not "right" number of times a couple should have sex, just as there is no "right" number of scoops of ice cream in an ice cream cone, it is just a matter of preference and somethings that couples need to negotiate on.
Another favorite of mine is how he discusses how we become comfortable with sex and if we haven't tried a specific sex act and come to accept it, it is gross and discusting. He talks about why would two people ever want to kiss. But after you have done it a while and aren't afraid of it, it can be fun. Same thing with French kissing, why would two people exchange germs and salavia? But after you become comfortable with it, and it becomes part of how you express yourself with your partner, it is enjoyable. The same thing with intercourse, oral sex, and just about any kinky sex that you can imagine.
Again, I suggest also getting the PM audio book so when you get discouraged, you can get the road map of where he is taking you and get re-motivated to do the heavy reading. I can't tell you the number of times I put that book down and didn't want to reopen it.
A final observation for you this weekend. You say that your wife "wants to be a model." I think that is a fairly unrealistic expectation for just about any woman but a small handful, especially at the age of 25.
Every once in a while I get the opportunity to listen to high school seniors talk about what they expect to accomplish in college and shortly there after. I am always amazed that the number that are going to save the world, get nobel prizes and invent something that will change the world. I then see many of them when they graduate from college and they are thankful to have jobs and positions of responsibility in the business community. Their expectations by the time they are 21 or 22 are much more realistic. By the time they graduate they know they need to pay off college loans, want to make some money to be independent and build careers. There is normally a lot of maturing that happens between age 18 and 22. I am also surprised with the ones that I have seen who are 28 to 30 and being responsible adults contributing to things, thinking of settling down and raising families.
I think I can understand your wife's MLC to a certain extent, in that she still has not reconciled her expectations with the real world (based on what you have written). At some point, she is going to have to scale back some of her expectations but continue to try to live up to some of her ideals. That can be a rough period of time to adjust to things.
Good luck to you.
>43 years of marriage--My wife and I are now closer than we have been in decades. I believe that my SSM is over.
