Yeah, throw in the good stuff too. I know a lot of it is just venting and it feels good to get it out. I've learned this is a safer avenue to vent than at our SO
...and I'm still used to getting really good deals vis-a-vis CAD to USD Heading to TO in a month and it still feels wrong to pay what the sticker says and have it convert the same to American :-P
In my own darkness, W and/or OM did not come out tonight to our weekly bar gathering. Had a good night. Coincidence?
Ok. I promise to include some good stuff, so that you folks get a more rounded view of things. I live about an hour west of Toronto. Was just in Milton (just outside of TO) tonight for the auction I was at.
Looking back at my last few posts, I realize again that the written word is *not* always the truest or most accurate way of communication. BTM, sorry if I've come across condescending recently. It's something I've tried to catch in myself but don't always get. Have to remind myself that if I truly had all the answers, would I be awake at 1:40 in the morning?
The auction sounds fun and I'm really happy that you got to hang out with the kids and respective bf! Thank you for sharing the good things along with the bad that brought all of us here!
Me 43 W 38 M 5 T 7 SD20 S15, S13 with 1st W ILYBNILWY June 2010 Separation/Bomb July 2010 Divorce Feb 8, 2011
I realized that maybe I have been giving the wrong impression by only posting negatvies here. I will be more conscious of that. For example, yesterday I booked a flight to Calgary during Stampede Week to visit my "longest serving" friend. We have been friends for over 25 years, but rarely see each other. I will hopefully also see another friend he and I hung out with many years ago. I have not seen him in over 20 years.
BTM, my parents live in Woodstock and I drive by your place which Im guessing is Guelph or Kitchener, when I go visit. My cousing used to coach the Milton Junior Hockey team.
anyway, keep up the good work on being dark. My darkness is working for me as its helping me detached. Im not sure if I want to be married to this woman anymore after everything that has gone down. She would have to show me that she is deeply sorry for the level of hurt she inflicted and some of the god awful things she said to me over the last year and a half.
Keep the darkness the black. It is helping me tremendously as is talking with the new girl.
9
BITS M-46 W-42 M-16y T-19 y s10 s15 BombDec.19/09 Sep-F16/10 Sep Papers signed by W- June 30/10 Recon July 5/10 PA foundOut- Oct 30/10 Mental HospNov/10 moved out Nov/10 Leg Sep Mar 15/11
BTM, it's great to catch up with old friends! I've got one that lives in Chicago I see once or twice a year. Been friends since we were 5 (37 years now). No matter what's going on in our lives, it's great to have that friendship and support behind us.
I'm not a rodeo person, but the Stampede sounds like it would be fun. I'm sure you'll have a great time with your buddies!
Me 43 W 38 M 5 T 7 SD20 S15, S13 with 1st W ILYBNILWY June 2010 Separation/Bomb July 2010 Divorce Feb 8, 2011
BTM, my parents live in Woodstock and I drive by your place which Im guessing is Guelph or Kitchener, when I go visit. My cousing used to coach the Milton Junior Hockey team.
anyway, keep up the good work on being dark. My darkness is working for me as its helping me detached. Im not sure if I want to be married to this woman anymore after everything that has gone down. She would have to show me that she is deeply sorry for the level of hurt she inflicted and some of the god awful things she said to me over the last year and a half.
Keep the darkness the black. It is helping me tremendously as is talking with the new girl.
9
You got the area right. We should have a beer (a dark one!) next time you are in the area. I find staying dark is the only thing helping me get through my anger at STBX. Maybe when that is (almost) gone, she can be a minor part of my life again. Maybe.
BTM, it's great to catch up with old friends! I've got one that lives in Chicago I see once or twice a year. Been friends since we were 5 (37 years now). No matter what's going on in our lives, it's great to have that friendship and support behind us.
I'm not a rodeo person, but the Stampede sounds like it would be fun. I'm sure you'll have a great time with your buddies!
Rodeo isn't my thing either. But, if I am going to see him in Calgary at some point, it may as well be that week. Another 20 year friend who lives in same city as me, but I never see, is going to be out there at the same time. Looks like all 3 of us may be able to connect for one day.
Since I have basically disowned by extended family (long story) and no longer have STBX around, it is nice to have old friends to connect with.
Ironic that I mentioned in previous post that I have disowned my extended family. I have one sister that I have had virtually no contact with in almost 12 years. She was the first one I eliminated from my life. Today, she showed up at my work! It was brief, but I made it clear I still want nothing to do with her. I handled it well.
I told S17 and a friend to guess the least likely person to visit me at work. S17 said "OM". I replied "ok..second least likely". Just hearing his name upsets me, but I didn't show it. I guess my kids know just how much I dislike the man. I hope that's not a bad thing. It's not like I bad mouth him or anything. We rarely say his name in our house, so it comes up rarely.
Obviously with both kids working with STBX and OM, they see him more than I would like. But, he will never replace me as their Dad, so it's really not a big deal.
couple things, not 2 x 4's but observations, and some questions...
Don't post about hiding assets from your w for the divorce settlement (like pending bonuses). It is frowned upon by the courts and will bite you in the a$$ if it gets out. Many feel it's dishonest/unethical.
Why'd you "disown" your entire extended family? Geez...and when your sister approached you, why did she? Did it even cross your mind to allow her back into your life?
Why not treat your w's birthday as an opportunity for a 180 and NOT contact her? Or if you MUST...send a text saying "happy birthday"...
She's with OM now and isn't making moves toward you or expressing confusion. If you've quit, you've quit.
It's okay if you haven't quit, but if you have, it's odd to hold on like this. And I notice a pattern of holding on...to grudges, old slights, her, pain...
Here's my final question. Have you ever been deeply hurt by someone, and then forgiven them?
You don't have to answer here, but maybe think about it.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
