I'm not talking about your life beyond your R with W. I agree, you are doing great.
I am talking about how you handle your current R with W.
Do I think you will reconcile if you change your behavior? No, not really. I think there would perhaps be a better chance, but it would probably be like going from none to slim. Really, I'm not even sure that if she did a 180 and wanted to recommit to the M that you'd be up for it, you might well be caught off-guard. But your passivity right now lets you feel comfortable in terms of being "right" while letting things (apparently) inevitably follow the "wrong" course. You get to do nothing and "win" in your own head.
Just *try* rereading PM. Figure out where YOU are and what YOU want and actively define and enforce YOUR boundaries, while letting the chips fall where they may. Maybe you are already doing that. I'm pretty sure you think you are already doing that. But, from here, it sounds a lot more like passive avoidance + withholding.
