Thanks for the warm welcomes too! I've been reading up on your sitch's and you are all amazing!! I feel like I am very fortunate to be in such good company.
Undie Please do jump right on in ......I let out a deep breath when I read what you said about Dr. K's crazymaking...I realized right away what you were talking about and you were right of course!
He is just trying to make "crazy"
It's so nice to have friends that know You!! Of course I will head off to church...and I WILL meditate tonight (Thank you, Soup wherever you are .)
The bankruptcy issue in and of itself is distressing, as it would be for anyone, but I think we could handle it if that was all there was, like there hadn't been a separation or lawsuit nonsense. In so many ways I would think bankruptcy would be a relief for some people!!..... Obviously this goes deeper than just money ( doesn't everything )
The true problem.... as it has always been..... MY insecurity and uncertainty.
The fear is: He's doing this as more crazy making and we are making our situation even worse He's doing this bankruptcy to get out from under the house and any of MY debt, then he'll file for Divorce and because of those papers from "1998", he'll think he doesn't have to support me in any way and can walk away.......
Now actually that is the fear..."I will be left"....and there I will sit rejected, vulnerable and looking foolish.
Someone once told me the thing to do is imagine the ABSOLUTE worst case scenario.... then realize you can still survive that!
As long as you are still breathing and still are in possesion of your soul....everything else....is Cake!
So what am I so afraid of?
If he's going to do this he's going to do it....nothing I do can stop or change it....
Do I think somehow what I do affects the outcome? Like I could make a wrong move or a wrong step...a bad decision.??
This is my own crazymaking. Thinking I can control for any of this.
I'm going back over to your post Undie and read up on you!
No beatings today. Mass and meditation are going to serve you best. You always come back down on both feet when you do that.
Remember when I had you redo the conversation on your trip to see D with Dr. K? I think you need to rework this one too.
Damn, Trish... this man loves you. He may be frustrated and a little crazy sometimes, but let him be crazy by himself. He doesn't need both of you in the rocking chairs and straight jackets!
So run away from the sanitarium and find some sanity in your pew this afternoon. I know you're going to find it too. You always do.
Hugs.
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Get some ibuprofen and let's start running after her! I just took 800 mg myself and probably could chase after Cycler for a few minutes.
That would justify me not going to the gym tonight. Didn't make it last night either, so it's going to have to wait until after work tomorrow--on my way to getting my hair done.
Trish, don't look back--we're following you!
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Did I happen to mention that yesterday morning while I was at the barn feeding the cats, dressed for work, I let my 14 year old deaf sheltie go back with me? I figure it is good exercise for her as the barn is a ways from the house.
Next thing I know she isn't where I last saw her out in the grass taking a tinkle.
I look around and finally see her running across my neighbor's field as hard as she can go. Nothing else around just her running. Sooooooooo guess who else was soon running across a muddy field, a driveway and under the pine trees to capture a sheltie you can't call to you.
I get to work and THEN notice I have mud splatters on my pants and my shoes.
So we both got some exercise yesterday morning. This morning I kept my eye on her the whole time!!!
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
Yep, you're right! I'll get a real poor excuse for exercising tonight when I take D9 to Target to do her Christmas shopping.
In the past, I'd have let her be and left her alone, but ever since that doofus in Ohio or Indiana yanked that girl out of Walmart and molested her when her mom was in the store, I've rethought that strategy. She's going to love my decision a lot. As if!
Time to stop running and catch our breath. My stamina sucks because I wasn't working out when I got sick. There's hell to pay now!
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
