Feel like I just don't care what H. does anymore. I don't care how he reacts to me either. I can be dressed to the point where I sizzle and his affect is flat, oh well...it is what it is. I no longer feel offended by his lack of reaction positive or negative either.
I am no longer avoiding R talk, because I need to discuss things for my own peace and understanding.
I love him, I always will, but it feels like he's gone on a long sea voyage that doesn't have a port of call, and no way to send out communiques although occassional signs of life are evident and the ship can receive telegrams.
I have been on a few "dates" to meet with men for coffee. They've been pleasant encounters that don't turn into anything more. That's fine with me. At least it gets me out there, refamiliarizes me with male/female social encounters, rejection and given me back my confidence.
BITS Me-51, WAS-52 Kids 2 M-26yrs, H.left 2009, 2 more Bomb drops, Reconnection spring 2013 Change is inevitable, personal growth is a choice. Love is a action and choice you make, every day.
