Earlier in the week, I had my annual performance review and it was very positive with the challenges of learning some new systems at work in the coming year. Given the state of the economy, I know any merit raise will be on the small side but I am good with that. My co-workers and managers are impressed with how I have taken on additional duties over the past year so it's time to build on that solid foundation and see what the road ahead offers...
Me 52, STBEX 52 D 17, S 12 M 20 years Em Sep since 2002, Phys Sep Sept 2009
Thanks Z. Yesterday's work was extremely hectic since we have two shifts coming in to work in the lab this weekend and I had to get their work files prepared in addition to my normal Friday routine but everything got done.
Enjoyed the school's annual show last night where the students participated in a number of songs and sketches. D performed a commercial that S wrote - they both did great! STBEX showed up as well (saved her a seat since she was coming from directly from work and I had to get there early with the kids) and not any problems to be had.
Kids are with STBEX this weekend so besides a concert and dance later on tonight, it will be a quiet weekend here. Lots of stuff to get done but better to be too busy than not enough!
Me 52, STBEX 52 D 17, S 12 M 20 years Em Sep since 2002, Phys Sep Sept 2009
A couple of interactions with STBEX the past few days have been interesting. She has expressed money concerns again - even though she makes over $20K more a year than I do. Now that the house is gone, she's been trying to figure out what the "new normal" is. We each had been carrying term life policies in case one of us dies before the house sold. With no house, no reason to keep the separate policies (we both are still covered through plans at our respective workplaces so it's not as if we're neglecting coverage).
So she e-mails me that she set the wheels in motion to lapse the current non-work policies - which I agreed to. She also mentioned that she's dipping into her non-work 401K to (and I am guessing here) clear away some credit card debt and was going to specify equal amounts be taken for Federal and state taxes. I replied back that I was a bit mystified at the tax set asides since state tax rates are quite a bit lower than Federal rates. I suggested that she might want to revisit that but it strictly her call to do so.
A couple of years ago, D went through orthodontia but hadn't been wearing her retainers as often as she really should have. Yesterday, our regular dentist said that her upper retainer was fine but the lower retainer was not fitting. When W picked up the kids for the evening, I relayed to her what the dentist said. W was in a bad mood about it initially - mainly because we hadn't set anything aside in the health savings account for it this year. Since S had an appt with the orthodontist today for an evaluation of his need for work, I said that I would inquire about an appt for D.
Anyway - S is not having anything done this year but the orthodontist did take some x-rays and photos to compare with ones he took last year. I asked about D's problem and he said that she should try wearing the lower retainer as much as possible before he sees D early next week. When I talked to W on the phone about this, she seemed to be in a much better frame of mind - especially if we don't have to pay anything out this year.
So finances are continuing to be a large concern for W even though she earns more than I do. As for me, it will take a couple of more months before I have a firm handle on my situation and know where to cut back...
Me 52, STBEX 52 D 17, S 12 M 20 years Em Sep since 2002, Phys Sep Sept 2009
If my horoscope from Jonathan Cainer is any indication, this should be a good week:
Quote:
Some people were born to be wild. Others were born to run. You were born to cope. It doesn't matter what life throws at you; you take it all in your stride and, when your stride is not long enough, you borrow a pair of stilts. Yours is rare talent. It may not be the stuff of which action movies are made, but if it were not for people like you, such films would not exist. Indeed nothing would exist - for nobody would make enough of a commitment. Your steadfastness, this week, is a blessing for many. Be proud of who you are!
I think this would apply to nearly everyone who has been and is on the boards...
This is also the last week of school for the kids as well as the last practice for the folk group until mid-August. So it will be time for summer camps and having the kids argue about how long each of them has been on the computer!
Something I am looking forward to taking the kids down to FL to visit my parents and one of my sisters. Although I keep in regular contact with my parents, the kids and I haven't seen them in several years. The last time we went down there, Mom had just gotten out of the hospital and wasn't up to seeing anyone - rotten timing but that happens sometimes.
It sure feels like summer outside - temps in the 90's with the humidity starting to climb...
Me 52, STBEX 52 D 17, S 12 M 20 years Em Sep since 2002, Phys Sep Sept 2009
Thank goodness they're safe! But in all seriousness, one of the last things my Dad had before he passed away recently was a Maple Syrup lollipop. My kids had given it to me and I happened to have in my pocket. He thoroughly enjoyed it and when you're dying of colon cancer those little things are what matter. Anyway, never under estimate the power of maple syrup!
Z - that was a really good DB weekend that MAL organized.
WII - I'll do my best to keep on the lookout for authentic Canadian maple syrup so I can enjoy the best power advantage!
Journaling...
School for the kids is done until late August and the "lazy, crazy, hazy days of Summer" are in full force here in NC. Hope we get the occasional respite with some much needed rain...
Interesting couple of conversations I had with my parents yesterday and with my IC today. I call periodically to check on my parents (both retired in their mid 70's in FL, in OK health and married for 54 years) and talked quite a bit with my Mom yesterday - catching up on family stuff. The convo gravitated towards when I could expect a resolution on my sitch. I told Mom that I was waiting until the end of June to see if W would finalize the financials on our sep agreement since she has been the main driver on this. I assured her that if there was no movement from W, I would take the reins and push this through to get closure.
Mom then related to me an interaction that she had with W from many years ago. At the time, W decided to make another go with H#2 and that she was breaking up with me. The reconciliation only lasted 3 to 4 days before she decided that her future was better with me in it. I knew that W had visited the school I was doing research at to see about transfering in and that she had interviewed for a job. What I didn't know was W had gone to talk to my Mom that same day (Mom and I worked in the same town). Mom relayed to W that if W hurt me again like she did during the breakup a few days ago, Mom would kill her. (Moms can be so fiercely protective of their kids!) W assured her that she was moving to be with me and that marriage and a family was in the cards.
This convo happened back in the late 80's so it helps for me to see that Mom was always a bit wary of W despite the good years we had in our marriage...
My IC appt for today went well - I see the guy every few weeks now for maintenance purposes. During our session IC kept referring to W as XW - and I was surprised by the fact that the term did not bother me at all. Although I will always be a work in progress, maybe I have finally embraced the acceptance of it all and am really ready to move to the next phase of my life. IC believes that I am ready for that next great relationship in my life. I don't know about that - but the thought of it scares and pleases me...
Me 52, STBEX 52 D 17, S 12 M 20 years Em Sep since 2002, Phys Sep Sept 2009
