Dark Side of the Moon

[ninelives]

Go break the 3 minute mile.

[BeTheMan]

LP - I have the house, yard, kids and animals. STBX (I think) wanted freedom from all that as much as she wanted freedom from me. Sundays used to be my favourite day of the week, since there was family time and it was the one time a week we could actually have a nice big family dinner. STBX is an amazing cook. Now, Sundays make me sad sometimes, because of those memories. But, by the time I clean the house, do yard work, laundry, grocery shop and make dinner, most of the day is spent. That's not a bad thing. Down time still allows my mind to wander.

Speaking of groceries, S17 brought me the usual weekly grocery money from STBX. The longer I stay dark, the more I expect her to stop paying. We have no legal separation agreement or anything. It's risky, but it is the best for me and the kids. I hope she is willing to stay with original plan of divorcing and selling house next July.

I wandered off there a bit..... This will be day 11 of dark for me. Where are you at? I should ask Nine the same thing. He is after all, our BID - brother in darkness.

[LearningPatience]

Today is day 14 for me, though I accidentally saw W on FB. She posted something in SD's page saying "no puppy pictures yet?" Didn't know SD got a puppy, guess I can ask her today, or at least see how she's doing.

I *hope* SD doesn't think I'm going dark on her too, but I'd understand if she isn't comfortable talking to me.

My run was pretty good this morning. It's so humid in my apt though that I think I'll buy a dehumidifier today. I can shop at a couple of different stores to pick up other supplies I need, so I guess I have something to do today. A little retail therapy perhaps (I'm the only guy I know that likes to shop).

[ninelives]

I dont mind shopping LP. Not like my W, man she almost killed me a few times at the mall. It took her 4 hours to buy a bathing suit once. Not kidding. I felt sooooo sorry for the retailer.

I left the mall 4 times to kill time and do some things and she still wasnt done. When she finally picked one, she returned it later because it made her look fat.

Keep on keeping on LP. Day 14 is good, dont panic and let her control your next moves ok. You are in control here.
You dont want to lose to me cause I will gloat.

9

[LearningPatience]

I can imagine how an addict must feel while going through withdrawal. There's a core part of me that wants to reach out and see how W is doing. It comes and goes in waves, right now, it's all I can do to keep my phone and email out of reach.

9, I'm not really a competitive person, but I don't like to be gloated at either . The challenge will be at our mutual friends' wedding on July 9. At least we aren't sitting at the same table.

I will be seeing OM this weekend for bachelor party for above friend. OM also 'stole' a longtime gf of another person going to the party. Not sure why any of us are (or were) friends with someone like that. Should be interesting...

Hang in there Brothers in Darkness!

[ninelives]

Wow, you have your trials cut out for you dont you? Dont worry, LP, I wont gloat, because you will be strong. It takes alot of guts to keep doing what you are doing and these events will test your mettle.

Keep the darkness strong and black.

9

[GAL Man]

July 9 is still a month away LP, a few more weeks of darkness before that day.

Day 8 for me and got an email from the W, brief response needed IMHO then talk on Sunday

Keep it up, and you two 9 and btm

[LearningPatience]

I'm going through phases where it's really tough for a while and then a piece of cake. This morning was one of the tough times. This afternoon, I walked over to the library (just to get some exercise and sunshine) and saw this librarian I'm attracted to. Little things like that helped to perk me up.

I noticed last week that my telltale signs of depression (lack of interest, moodiness, etc) were starting to resurface. Hmm, wonder why. Talked to my dr and he agreed to increase my AD dose (it was a little on the low side to begin with). Too soon to tell if it's working, but the side-effects have kicked back in. Thankfully they're not bad or too annoying. Hopefully this will help be get back on track where I need to be.

I've had this weird urge to go buy myself a suit. I tend to be a very relaxed dresser (polos and khakis for work) but figure I'll need one for friend's wedding. I honestly can't remember the last time I've worn a suit, it's been so long. Maybe I'll see if I can find something I like this evening. This is so 180 for me that I think its 360

[hope2011]

Go for it. A new suit is well deserved!

A bachelor party with OM? You are a bigger person than I am. If you can pull off being there without any hint that you care he's there and not overtly ignore him but just not appear to care either... the ultimate acting as-if going dark. Will say some prayers for you on Saturday.

When I DB'd the XH I went dark for almost a year. A year. It was like breaking a drug addiction, it was hard as heck. The first 6 months I was a basket case but I didn't have much options as he moved out of the town we lived in, had no communication with anyone and we had no kids together at that point. Going dark is easier when they don't communicate. But it was hard, very hard and though I'm in piecing now some days I wish I could go dark to get a break from the roller coaster but then I remember even then you're on the roller coaster. It gets easier, it really does. And it does make a difference. Keep up the good work.

Thanks for popping over to my thread and posting, I really appreciate it.

[LearningPatience]

Thank you for the encouragement and prayers! At times I feel like I'm a pickup truck and bassett hound away from the ultimate country song!

Just to add to this weekend's fun, the bachelor party is a long weekend in Milwaukee (we're from MI). Two and a half days together - they'd better not put us in the same hotel room - two men enter, one man leaves

If you've read some of my earlier posts (I'm a bit long windy, so don't worry if you didn't) a group of 5 of us, including W and OM, went to Hong Kong and Japan earlier this year. If I can make it through that...

Maybe I subconsciously like the drama.