Sorry you are here, BUT you came to the right spot.
Ditch the DB book and go get the DR - Divorce Remedy book.
To be honest, complacency is the death of a marriage. Does that mean yours is over with? Nope, but are you ready to do the work?
"In the last 1.25 years she has lost weight, joined the gym, and likes going out with her friends to the bar or parties on a regular basis (all of which was new behavior for her)."
Red Flag: Is there someone else involved? Does your gut tell you?
her "midlife crisis" which is also complicated by a mild to moderate dose of depression from her daycare hell (her words not mine)
Could be a crisis, but depression is real and is usually caused by more than just "one" thing
(she says i'm tight with money, a slob, dont do enough around the house to help her, dont spend enough time with the kids, too sedentary and unhealthy) all things that I have made efforts to improve since February, and that's where I am at.
She is being honest on this, but my question to you is when you hear this, do you agree with her assessment? Do you see this in you?
You bring up WAW, chances are if this is true, it has been a long time coming. There is no magic quick fix for this. As much as time has gone by, time and work is whats going to change this. Here is the key though and I really need you to understand this...
IF you can't make these changes for yourself and you do it only for her, she will KNOW. You have to do this for you and FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. Change forever. Can you do that friend?
Good job on the gym and losing weight btw. Don't stop. Get lifting some serious weight too, push your body. Creates testosterone, confidence, and more muscle means you burn more fat.
I read your post but try to keep your thoughts spread out a little and in smaller chunks. People will read, but a wall of text is hard to cover everything. No offense, but easier reading makes it easier to respond
I look forward to hearing from you. Your not alone.
