Hello! I've been following along. My H has not been verbally abusive except possibly in the beginning. Then he pretty much said he "had to be" because he felt so bad and guilty that he didn't know how to treat me.
My H also avoids conflict...he prefers to talk on the phone because I think it really bothers him to look me in the eye after all he's done. He's sat on my couch and chatted about nothing important and then called me 10 minutes after leaving to tell me how horrible he feels about all that he's done. He says he feels numb and doesn't know if he'll ever be happy but he's still w OW and I don't see that ending.
I try not to believe or read into anything he says but its so hard not to have hope. I backslide but I've noticed I recover much more quickly.
I've lost 50 lbs since my husband left and twice in the past week he's commented on how good I'm doing...once even tried to say that he thought the only way I'd be happy was if we separated so he did it for me? Yeah, still on the crazy train.
Hang in there. You're a wonderful, caring, beautiful and intelligent woman.
