I am sick of losing my self respect and licking up crumbs and literally HATE to see others do it.
Your self respect is determined by your wife's actions?
Not arguing with you.
I just don't agree with you.
My loss of self respect would have come from my actions. Not from my wife's choice of a duchebag lover.
This choice to try your best to save a marriage, this is the worse part of: "for better or worse."
Better is a piece of cake.
But don't ever compare your self worth to your wife's horrible choices.
Your self esteem and worth should be a bit battered because of what you own up to in your part of your marriage failing, but not from her choices. Not as long as you're addressing your failings.
I never said that my self respect is determined by STBX's actions and it's not. My actions ate at my self respect. No matter what she did, I kept trying harder and harder. She was literally doing every thing she could to destroy our marriage and our family and I just kept trying to make it better.
I forgave myself a long time ago for my failings in the marriage. I more than made up for them with Herculean efforts over the last 5 years.
What I meant by my comments was that I lost some respect for myself in that it was like she could do anything, and it would be just fine with me - as long as she came home some day. But....I quit a couple weeks ago and ever since then I feel so much better.
You would have to read all my threads to understand this...but I never had a chance. STBX had a carefully laid out plan from day one and there was nothing I could do to combat it and save my marriage.
