Just to be clear, I would not suggest filing but for the credibility issue not filing raises. It might be possible, given your somewhat shared view that the marriage certificate is just a piece of paper, to just walk away without filing and keep your credibility. If you think you can, I would recommend that option.
As far as the texting and the phone calls go, I can see how in the short term you might feel that the communication, poor as it is, is soothing you and the situation somehow. If you feel that way I would like to suggest you think hard about that. I know how hard it is and how strong the compulsion can be for us contollers to want as much data as we can get when we feel we're at a decision point. In my view absolutely nothing good can come from further contact with your wife right now. I hope you will stop and give both yourselves time to process what's happened here.
I think Jack's correct, re-set your clock to 90 days and take a series of deep, deep breathes.
