I don't believe I qualify as an oldtimer on this Board, but here goes anyway:
IMHO it will hurt nothing for you to return his email inquiries in a friendly manner, although I would think you shouldn't initiate them.
Yes, I understand there are feelings that I will always harbor for the man my X used to be, but he may never be that man again. As you've said, it's as if grieving a death.
My D's and BFF all think that there will come a day when XH darkens my doorstep again. Will I be strong? I don't know. But I really can't afford to worry about that now. Que sera sera and all that.
FWIW, I see no harm in exchanging emails as 'old friends'. Have no expectations, no secret agendas, just take it as it flows, and see what pans out. If you truly are no longer interested, and if he made that overture, you will know when the time comes, and can gently rebuff him. No need to worry about that now.
