I don't know why...

[New2day]

Thanks punkin. Trust me...after how UNstable I was 3-4 years ago today I am WONDERFULL!!! And yes, I do have my lows. Most of the time it's a few hours of a day. This time for some reason it has lasted somewhat longer. Maybe it's because I was working on a friends letter for his 25th High School reunion and realized that in August, it would have been my 25th wedding anniversary. who knows. Since then it's been kind of eating at me.
Ex called about a business matter that we still have but then the conversation led to him and all about him. I call it selfish and cruel. He does not seem to grasp the idea that by him sharing all of this "stuff" that him and OW are doing hurts me. That in my heart it should be me with him not her. He is selfish and he just doesn't get it.
Thanks for being here you two! Take care!

[irishblessings]

New -
In less than a year's time I have gone from the love of X's life - to the cause of all that is ill and wrong in his life. During that time our 25th wedding anniversary occurred and since he had left a couple months earlier - I of course heard nothing from him. I took my kids and closest friends out for dinner and wrapped myself in the blessing of their love and support. It was a terribly difficult time - I had placed so much value in that day. My parents divorced right after their 25th and I was so certain that my marriage would last forever.
I think you are correct when you believe that in your heart it should be you with him - but the difficult thing to realize is he is not "him" any longer. He has transformed into someone you would not have chosen to be with given the choice 25 years ago.
Right now my XH is flaunting OW in front of everyone. The kids have let him know they are not interested in meeting her right now - but he still arrogantly demonstrates that it is his life and no one else matters.
You are truly a lovely, kind, feeling person who deserves a life filled with love and support. Keep moving forward and believe that good things are yet to come.
Have a great weekend!
IB

[New2day]

Well thank you IB! I wish you just the same:)

[punkin]

New,

I do understand the cause of your 'low'. Yesterday i babysat my two oldest grands who live in the town next to where XH lives, and that in itself put me into a funk. Just the knowledge he is 'in the vicinity'. Glad to be home and 80 miles away.

[New2day]

It's hard because it takes so little to open the jar again...