"I found you! Didnt realise you were still posting."
I was posting in my normal place. I did not think I was that hard to find. But I am glad you posted.
"You know what my dear friend? You are sooooo stuck. Both of you but mostly you (mostly because I dont "talk to her")."
I am stuck.. you have that much right. I doubt that she feels much different than I do. You "hear" from her in my posts. I take responsibility for my actions.
I am walking away.
"So, what are we going to do?"
Something Different?
Check.
"IMHO, you cant do much at this point. Because you sound like you dont have the energy to."
I don't. If there was something to "see" then I likely could find the energy. This is not a choice that I made "today". It is the outcome of the "stitch" I find myself in.
"I sense a lot of "entitlement", grudges, etc etc. Not in a vindictive way."
I am "entitled" Kalni. That is why you sense it. I have every reason in the book to dump this M. I feel like I have been carrying the flag for a long time. At times I question if I carried the flag too high. I am not trying to prove a point.. I am just done. I am not the person that I am supposed to be living like this.
"In the way that most LBSs would feel if they had to face the same sh!t twice."
4-5 times.. who is counting.
"Move out, calm down, really calm down, miss her and THEN save your M."
I hope I miss her. This is the calmest I have been in a long time. It is a good choice. I am almost sure that there is more to the story. And I have not "stalked" at all. I have had alot of stress in my life that past few weeks.. but this just feels.. "right"?
"Moving out may not follow the rule of not moving out your house but it follows the rule of "do something different and feel good about yourself again"."
I don't know that DB.com has ever said that moving out was bad.. or wrong. From my point of view it is a option. It can create a chance to "change" things. I already feel good about myself. I am not the guy that she "says" I am. I am not the guy that deserves what I have been given.
We sign the papers tomorrow. And I move out June 1st. I am walking away from alot but she is to. It is a reasonable parting of ways. We have told the kids and so far I have not seen them act "crazy".
What can I say other than..
Off we go.
Relax Eat Think Act normal React.. Smartly. Do something different. Emulate. Do Work.
