It isn’t that I feel uncomfortable around you. I just don’t feel the same way about you anymore. It is harder with your mom around. I keep waiting for her to bring it up and I know she wants me to forgive you and forget everything happened but I just can’t. Right now I am tired of trying to make this marriage work. It has been almost a month and I truly don’t feel any different then I did when I first found out. I don’t want you living out of your car. We are so far behind on bills that neither one of us can climb out of it alone. You are right I don’t want you touching me, at all. The thought still disgusts me. That is what I am having the most trouble with. You didn’t think twice at putting yourself or me at risk when you slept with her, twice. I do still think I want a divorce, I just don’t know how to do it with out destroying us all. I don’t want the kids to have to move out of the house, or change schools. I feel that if I stay with you I am destroying myself. Giving up every ounce of dignity I have, all my self respect. Not only that what am I teaching Emma, that it is ok to let a man completely disrespect her and that it is ok. And Jacob that it is ok to disrespect a women. I just can’t do that. The more you push the more I want out. I feel like I can’t even have a minute to my thoughts or feelings. I have told you this and told you this and I don’t know what to do anymore.
Thanks Jack I guess I was going into overkill a little bit.
