Im trying not to show her any anger and actually trying to go one better. Trying not to have any anger. Im doing way better in this dept. Still havent reached the level of foregiveness that I want to attain. I hope it comes some day. Got to keep trying to achieve this.
The thing that helped me the most with both anger and forgiveness is meditation. There are some really good guided ones specifically for this.
While it sounds like you have a plan of attck fot this, never hurts to have something else in your arsenal.
9 - have a great and safe trip this weekend. Don't think about how you and your W used to enjoy your birthdays together. Just concentrate on enjoying your trip. This weekend is a gift - don't waste it!
I get it guys. Im really happy ( and Im serious when i say this), that you guys can joke about this. Because I have always been the one in the group we joke about. I dont mind at all.
And you guys are right, I have struggled with being dark and still trying to be upbeat. Probably should not have had son chime in but I didnt think he was going to say the I love you without the mom part. He did the same thing last weekend from the ferry but had the mom part right away.
Im trying to detach and be friendly and forgive. Im trying to be upbeat in the texts. We really havent had much face 2 face interaction.
Bottom line is that I will not argue with her anymore and will really try to MOVE on with my life.
If she comes back, it will be a long time down the road. I know this now for sure.
Thanks for all the support and replies.
9
BITS M-46 W-42 M-16y T-19 y s10 s15 BombDec.19/09 Sep-F16/10 Sep Papers signed by W- June 30/10 Recon July 5/10 PA foundOut- Oct 30/10 Mental HospNov/10 moved out Nov/10 Leg Sep Mar 15/11
have a good weekend. And can you try sometime to NOT tell her you're alone this weekend?
I mean, why no mystery? You can have a little...right? So why not return from the weekend with a GLOW ON YOUR FACE about how surprisingly good it was? NO other comments needed. Indeed, just tell the boys and let them sort of pass it on....you know, Just that you "met some really nice people" and you "really Liked the place you visited & want to go back sometime soon".... maybe, you could even make this a true statement?
Happy Birthday 9.
The alternative to aging kind of [censored] (i.e., death) so don't avoid the birthdays. You're a survivor and a thriver! Note the milestones and mark them as times of learning. The more you learn, the more peace you'll have in your life.
And one last reminder...you DO realize your w is not in a good place? I'd so rather be you.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
When she did ask me where I was going, I said, " I dont really know, Im getting on the bike and riding, I have a couple of destinations in mind"
Thanks for all the well wishes. I WILL have a good time.
Also 25, Ive had some people tell me that they would rather be in my shoes than hers. Im starting to believe it.
Let me use my birthday as a symbolic leaping day to a new life. A real birth day as corny as that may sound.
9
BITS M-46 W-42 M-16y T-19 y s10 s15 BombDec.19/09 Sep-F16/10 Sep Papers signed by W- June 30/10 Recon July 5/10 PA foundOut- Oct 30/10 Mental HospNov/10 moved out Nov/10 Leg Sep Mar 15/11
Let me use my birthday as a symbolic leaping day to a new life. A real birth day as corny as that may sound.
9
THAT, my friend, is a GREAT idea!
It's what I did for mine. While I went out for supper with the kids, I enjoyed my whole b-day week. Really enjoyed it... for ME...
I know what it's like to point a bike or car (used to have a convertible mustang) in a direction and just GO... See where the road took me. Lot's of great discoveries. Not just people and places, but often the best discoveries were about me.
lol