9,
Whooah....you almost got an A+...okay, we'll say A-...pretty close!

til you said the part about how it saddens you that she's spending time with OM blah blah blah.....TIL THEN YOU WERE GOING SO STRONG....

I could barely believe it was YOU... grin

Remember that your happiness "index" is NOT related to her misery index.

(But if it were-- She's NOT a happy camper- so even if her misery factor were your index for happiness, I'd think YOU WOULD BE HAPPY!!--she's so miserable and bitter and self pitying and --clueless about HER role in creating it, or hiding from it but it is ALL about HER....telling YOU about this...)

OKAY so the point is, you must absolutely keep up the detachment work which your conversation IS an example of, b/c although you two spoke, you handled it well. You did NOT get sucked in. That's a big part of detachment.

But this thing you do about feeling sadness and letting it in, and telling her your plans, AND finding out hers or imagining them...is off track.

BTW, If she were madly in love with OM, or even reasonably satisfied with the choices she has made, she'd never tell you the things she has said.

What a pity party! She's miserable with where she's landed.

All you can do is what you are doing, contrasting your behavior NOW, with the previous behaviors you showed, (your 180s') and a PMA. (Hey, "fake it til you make it", really does help).

I cannot help but notice the contrast between your life now, and her life now. She's noticing too. Ooops. I don't know what that means. (Karma??)

Keep up the good work, it IS working. You are doing better, this is great progress.

Please don't freak yourself out by obsessing this weekend and thinking she's having the best sex EVER, and loving her new cool life with that winner of a boyfriend she has, and NEVER having a single 2nd thought about her great choices, and all the wealth she's basking in, and all the fun she's having and all the room she has in her new "freedom pad" and wonderful close R's with her super normal healthy fun family, and her sons...please...PLEEAASEE cry It's a lie you told yourself about her life, but really, it's NOT HER life that matters now.

What matters now is how YOUR life is going. How's THAT?

Have a good weekend. You deserve it.

M: 57 H: 60
M: 35 yrs
S30,D28,D19
H off to Alaska 2006
Recon 7/07- 8/08
*2016*
X = "ALASKA 2.0"
GROUND HOG DAY
I File D 10/16
OW
DIV 2/26/2018
X marries OW 5/2016

= CLOSURE 4 ME
Embrace the Change