IB,

I agree with brooklyn, that re-reading your old journal will only tare you up inside and make you focus on the negative. Maybe find some inspirational reaings or self help books on emotions at the library. I find that reading is one of the best things I feel helps me during all these past/current three times my H has left.

I cant focus on novels, so I have indulged in bying alanon books and inspirational literature, that I feel gives me some answers.

Have you read co-dependent no more. I feel it can be applied to many of our sitch's here on these boards... (not just for those that lived with alcoholics).
TIPPER