I wanted to add--the closer my H came to Acceptance, the more extreme his mood swings became, from admitting the OW was only an EA because spending short bursts with her kept him from being bored by her to thinking he'd never be happy without her in his life somehow, from making plans for his family to wanting to change everything about his life, from happy outbursts to talk of suicide, from wanting to talk openly to me to extended silences, and so forth. He seemed to be getting further and further away from his family even as, mentally, he was preparing to commit to us.
Did you ever read those fairy tales where the heroine is told that to get the hero back she's going to have to spend a night holding his hand while he keeps shape changing? It may seem as though he's turned into a wolf who's going to eat her, or all sorts of devilish monsters, but as long as she stands still and doesn't let go his hand throughout the night, she will get her heart's desire. Remember those stories when your MLCer struggles to attain his true form.
