Tipper - anger is a good place to pass through and a bad place toget stuck in. Like all strong emotions it is coming from somewhere [often deep seated and long repressed hurt]. All too often people tell you you how much harm it does you. Well that is true, but like many things in this life, it is good too, or at least, has positive aspects because it suggests that you have a returning sense of self-hood. You are outraged, hurt, disappointed [and a whole lot else] at what your h has done. You are waking up and smelling the coffee, and a lot of buried things are surfacing in anger.
It is normal to feel anger if someone does something awful. It is how we deal with the anger and what we do next that matters.
If someone deliberately steps on your foot, for example, most people would feel both hurt and anger. They wouldn't then hit the other person, [unless they were emotionally about 4] Nor wold they brood about it for weeks. But no-one would say - don't be cross about it. They might say 'Don't let it get to you' That is different. The point is that what you are feeling is a legitimate emotional response that will enable you to move forward. To deny the anger is to deny yourself something important you need to feel fully and deal with. Just my 2c.
