I saw your plan b letter and thought about advising against it. Still, I think we all need to do certain things in order to understand what does and does not work. Learn by experience.
I'd done a lot of similar letter writing in the past to my W. It either pissed her off or pushed her further away. It was never helpful, although there were some rare revelations in a couple instances.
In the end, it does seem that unless moving towards piecing, and even in those situations, letter writing is not a good way to discuss feelings.
Your expectations were met. And as you mentioned, you do not know this person. Eventually, you may have the opportunity to get to know them and whether you want to be with them.
