Affair (continued)

[awest1217]

I agree 25 there is always OW out there for a guy to cheat with...in my case it was a married woman with my married H so double whammy there.

Chris-You are really getting pounded on here. I know you are trying and everyone on here just wants to help. The main points that I am hearing from people is that you need to become more self-aware. I do believe that you want to make your M work, but sometimes what you say and do don't match your intentions. Right now with your W, she is possibly being as critical as some of the ladies on here if not more because I know I would be, so take what is being said as advice. Really watch what you say like is it your family or our because changing a pronoun like that shows completely different intentions.

It is all things to think about as you continue your IC and also as you make yourself better. It is a great chance to grow and growing is hard, especially when it must take place quickly, but it is always worth it. I was the cheated on spouse and I know I did some things that didn't help the situation, not that an A is ever EVER ok, but on my own I have grown and become a better person. It was hard, but I am glad I did it. Now it is your turn. It is hard, but in the end it will make you a better man, husband, and father, which is all important.

One question on my mind is do you think some of the "my" and "me" is coming from you already DBing before? Do you subconsciously feel like you already did this and don't want to do it again? It was hard work before and maybe you are revolting against the idea of hard work especially knowing that you caused the issue this time? I don't want an answer just something for you to look inside yourself and ask the tough questions so you can change and work.