Nope, nothing else I can do, and it's actually not borrowing, it's liquidating it. It will cost me 20% in taxes off the top, which I'm not worried about with my puny income, I'll get most of it back. No 10% penalty if I use it as a downpayment on a house, which I intend to do. Right now, having a home that is mine is far more important than any other consideration.
Punkin, My ex divorced me and I kept praying for restoration. He did come back for another 4 years. Yes, you need to grieve for the loss of your marriage but you need to take care of you too. During my h divorce, I went back to school and got a MA. This was for me and something he could not take away from me. It was the best thing that I did and did it for me while he was in his fog. GAL. You take care of you1 Lynda
Okay guys. Here's the scoop. I offered on a house. The owners countered, I counter-countered. ( This is kind of fun ) Looks like we may be able to meet in the middle.
Then, if everything goes well, I would get my wish of having the summer to slowly move and place my possessions in the new house, deciding what could be auctioned, donated, or just thrown away.
Started to tell you all about the house, but don't want to jinx myself!!!! Suffice it to say when I sit on the front porch swing, it felt like HOME.
Haven't heard any screams out of the XH yet. The quiet is disquieting. HMMM.
I'm keeping my fingers cross for you. It's time that your luck turned around!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Thanks everyone. My realtor is holding off my counter-counter offer till today to extend the suspense. If I get it, I can begin to quietly start moving into it during the summer, sifting through things here and deciding what needs to go or not.
Found that XH had been out to the house again - not in it - but here, and took a bear-made-out-of-a-stump that said welcome on the front porch. What a douche. He has only taken things that he and I acquired on our trips together. Freud says Veerryy Interesting. To be cautious though, I have moved the grill from the back deck to inside the garage, and will move it to a friends house this weekend. What on earth is he thinking? Is he thinking?
I wish I knew what happened to the house if it goes for auction and no one buys it. Credit wise, I mean. I've done some reading that says usually the mtg. company will take the house and sell it short because it is easier and less costly than a foreclosure. I hope so.
I know that having this house thing going is distracting me from my grief, etc., but it sure is a happier feeling than before.
Have a great Tuesday ( if there is such a thing ) my friends.
Punkin, I know exactly what you mean about moving your grill to a friend's house. I swear your xh is just like mine. They do these silly things to: 1) let us know that they've been there; and 2) to show you that you can't stop them and they will take the first thing in sight, no matter what it is. Very, very childish and entitled. I feel for you!
As for your new home, I do hope everything goes well and you can slowly and quietly move things into it. It's time for you to have a new beginning and environment. When you do finally move, please make sure that your xh's mail does not follow you!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Whoopee!! My counter offer was accepted. I have an appointment at 9 A.M. tomorrow morning with mtg. broker. House has to pass home inspection to include termite inspection.
Hopefully, this doesn't jinx the deal but: The house is 105 years old, with dark cherry wood Pella flooring and carpet in the 3 bedrooms. Parquet flooring in the kitchen and two full baths which include a walk in shower and a huge claw foot tub! The electrical lighting is beautiful and age appropriate for the house. There is a wood burning fireplace in one corner of the living room. Gas heat and elec. central air. Included in the house is the cook stove, built in dishwasher, and a fridge, along with a practically new washer and dryer pair. Separate pantry/storage. Mud room off the back of the house. Original doors, including pocket doors between the living and dining room, and a butler's pantry door to the kitchen. Crown moulding throughout. The large back yard is completely privacy fenced, and there is a 12 x 20 concrete block storage building in the back. Small patio. Beautiful flowers planted all around. Huge lilac bushes. Crepe myrtles in the front, with a swing on the front porch. There is some work to be done, but nothing that I can't live with for awhile. There is no garage or carport, but I would like to build to suit the house later on. All on a wide tree lined avenue surrounded by similar houses, and three straight blocks to the prettiest park this side of heaven.
I don't sound excited, do I?????
ME: 54 Him: 51 M: 20 years T: 21 years OW/New wife: 36 Sons & Daughters: 7 (ages 24-36) Bomb: March 4, 2010 He Filed: April 28, 2010 I Contested: May 1, 2010 Standing Down: 11/24/10 Divorced : 05/04/2011
Congrats....I am packing as I write this.....when can I move in?
I can do dishes, laundry, windows, clean and I am great with kids the grands will just adore me!
On a serious note....I am so happy for u. When's the party?
Eric
"The difficulties of Life are intended to make us BETTER,not bitter". "Fear is a prison, where you are the jailer. FREE YOURSELF!" "Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B." - Jack3Beans
