Well, I have to say in the process of packing up her items, my sister and I came across some journals and, though it be a massive breach of privacy, I wanted some insight. And unfortunately found it. She documented how she felt trapped, lifeless, that sex was something she only did because I seemed to like it, that she knew I would never leave her but thought she might leave me if she kept feeling inferior, and wrote at some length about the amazing emotional connection she felt with an OM she met at the neopagan retreat she was studying. He asked her repeatedly if she was in an exclusive monogamous relationship, saying "dammit" when she assured him she was. They hugged. Isn't it sweet?
Hmm. I thought I would feel anger. Instead I'm just numb. I've met this OM before I knew; W introduced us hoping we could be friends. He's a real charmer in person, which explains why I instantly disliked him. And guess where she stayed overnight a few times en route one of her trips? She did assure me that she hadn't had a physical relationship with anyone "yet". Still...
Oddly, the primary emotion I feel is... disappointment. I expected more from her.
Would I forgive her? At this point, still yes. I'm not sure, though, how long that will continue.
