I know that letting go and moving forward for ME is what I need to do in the long run. Overall, I think I have been semi successful with this. Especially with what I have shown her.
I think my confusion right now, is more for the short term, while she is still dealing with the death of FIL. I don't feel it is right to leave her in the rear view mirror right now.
With that said, I feel a lot more comfortable today with where I am and what I am doing. 25, you made a good point. Just keep being good.
So I got a long text from her today regarding some schedule changes. She is taking next Sat and Sun off to go to the coast with her mom. She switched the days with others, which means some changes with daycare and my time with D.
I responded with "Sure, np. It is important for you to spend time with your mom."
She said "I'll call with details. Thank you so much"
She then added give D a kiss for her and asked me to let daycare know of the changes. She has asked me to be the one to call daycare before, and after the last time I was tempted to ask her to call them, but with everything going on, not now.
Anyways, I said I would.
W: "Thanks for taking care of all of this."
So then she calls. We go over the details and work most of it out. No biggie for me. I lose 2 nights next weekend, get one back the following, and she offered a few suggestions for me getting the other night. She wanted to make sure none of this shorted my time with D. I said we can work that detail out later, it's not a huge concern for me right now.
So we also talk about how work went for her last night. She said it is still hard. She said how much receiving the picture last night meant to her (guess that was a good idea). I told her I would send her another one tonight.
She brought up how she has times now of feeling normal, but still a lot of saddness. She cried for a while yesterday. Talked about how preoccupied her mind is, which I know people here said it would be).
We also had some light convo about D. She told me about a funny video she had of her, and she would send it to me.
Her mom called while we were talking, she said she would just call her back. This surprised me.
Anyways, she was getting to work and we ended the convo.
Soon after she sent me the video she was talking about and a couple text back and forth about it.
And that is it.
She is taking D up to her moms this weekend as well. A part of me loves that all of this is taking time away from OM. Does that make me a bad person?
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Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
