The things she said to you -- about finding out about past GFs -- is standard infidelity "script," and yes, it's to assuage her guilt and make herself feel better about what she was doing.
Starsky
Guess my sitch isn't so different after all.
(forgot to add "function checking" to that list of don'ts)
Me 53 XW 50 M 18 Years +2 S14 D19 Bomb 10-24-10 Served 1-27-11 Mediate 4-21-11 Civil D Final 6-2-11 No church anullment "A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits."