Good Morning Tipper, Hi my name is Cindy. I havent posted much but have followed several stichs on this board. Hi Punkin and no i havent started my own thread...yet
A little background...I'm 55.6 months old ( yes im counting ) Been with the same man for 40 years married 28 Was raised by an alcohlic father, married a workaholic / alcoholic and found alanon in 1996 ( while my hubby was in rehab ) No he is not sober. He is not a bar fly, but he is what i call my weekend warrior. Thats when he does his heaviest drinking. Self employeed...yep, He drives and operates heavy equipment, so he sets his own hours, and oh yeah and he is my boss ( or so HE thinks ) We actually do well working together.
I am so happy to see that you have joined Alanon, it literally was a life saver for me.
I cried for the first 3 months after I joined Alanon, finding it very hard to express myself, but the beauty of it was everyone knew what I had been going thru. Sorta the " been there done that " but LOOK here is a better way to live.. and with their patience the program showed me a different way of life. That I had choices, you always have choices....I learned forgiveness ( that was a big one for me ) and that it was for me, not the alcohlics in my life Forgiveness to my father who committed suicide when he was only 53..God i was sooo mad at him for years. Talk about angry.. Alanon taught me to put the focus on me, and how to take care of me..Do you see alot of ME's in here..lol
Alanon is for U , not to get your husband to change He wont until he wants to...that rock bottom U hear all the time that is for them to find NOT us
I read your post about him filing for the divorce..He had called late at night, of course drunk. Please, please dont fall into this trap...believe nothing that he says and probably wont remember.
After reading the wise posts to U from 25mlc and others, you have alot of help here. Please listen to them, esp about getting yourself some counceling. U are waviering ALL over the place.
Try to stay calm, breath, repeat the serenity prayer , what ever it takes to keep U focused on your goals...speaking of which from one of your earlier posts U had started a list of short term and long term goals...
1) Go to alanon 2) To be happy? 3) To improve your self esteem ? 4) To start a new career ?
Go a little deeper than this..just how do you plan to obtain these goals.
After reading your post to Irish, I can see that you are absorbing some of the information that is being offered to you. And its alot to take in. Now its not all about just words You have to take action, live the slogans, the steps, the advise u get here I know U can do!!
