Power of Prayer...........This is Worth the Read!

[25yearsmlc]

actually glam, the SINGLE thing I "liked" about my sitch back then, was how good I looked... The grief diet and fanatical exercising has its' advantages...

I'm only half kidding. My thing was that I jogged with my Ipod and had playlists of "optimistic" music, sad music--for times I needed to grieve in private, "romantic" music for me thinking either of h to motivate, or a future OM as yet unknown but picturing myself happy with someone other than h, sometimes helped and music that made me feel fine without any man. Also had books on tape/IPOD and they helped so much. Like books on "Handling Fear & Anger" and "Return to Love" by Marianne Williamson. She's new agey for some but She basically got me to do forgiveness exercises, for lack of a better term. Sometimes my jogs were more like "Fury Runs" wherein I would go and go and go...and you know what I mean. Sometimes they were more like Marches of Sadness", etc. But dang, they helped me, and the whole outlook. But I really liked doing them by myself. It was my only "alone" time.

So simple, yet not so easy. Like DBing in a way.

Alright (stomping my feet and dusting self off) h is out of town & I am making a change back to the ONE good thing about the MLC. (Plus I refuse to need "hell" in my life to get back in shape). I MUST get in shape even though my life is good...yes, I just read that again and shook my head at myself..wth? Like I NEED to have $%^@#$ to take care of my body? Dang....no, NOT me!

Okay, done! I'm officially on my new program starting tomorrow. H will love that anyhow. He asks me to join him in his workouts but honestly, I have never enjoyed exercising with him. None of the kids do either but We all enjoy Playing sports. I was an athlete in college when h met me. But that's not the same as working out with him. He's like a drill sergeant, although happier. And the "walk runs" are like Bataan Death marches from my Army days. He runs and runs until I feel like I've been in labor only there's no baby reward coming...

No more whining...The concept is worthy. And so am I and it would mean a lot to him. Alright, Thanks for the motivation!!