Had a terrible nightmare last night. Dreamt about H and OW. They were laughing and having the best time together. It made me sick to the core. Woke up in a sweat.

I was quite upset yesterday about the decision to have to go dark. I had made up my mind not to see H and do family stuff together. However, after my nightmare I questioned myself again. I missed my H terribly frown But it would seem that GOD is looking out for me. This morning I received a message from H. He said he was taking a day off and wanted to spend the morning with S3. Then he would be going to a few interviews in the afternoon. Phew! The decision was made for me. So now I dont have to see H. I assume that he will be avoiding me for the next week or month. But Im ok with this. Im working on me and GAL.

Ive been going to the gym during my lunch break and this has really kept my spirits up. I feel so good afterwards smile. Im also going to enrol in that self defence class.

Im a little sad that I wont have contact with H. But I know its best for both of us. We both need this time to sort through things. And besides he is in replay so its best that I leave him alone to work through his feelings for OW. In time he will realise the person that she is. In time he will realise the person I am. In the meantime I will better myself but not for H, for me.

Im in a good place today. Infact I am sending good vibes to H. I hope he does well in his job interviews. I think that he is a wonderful lawyer and any company would be lucky to have him - when he is in the right frame of mind that is wink

Cant wait for the weekend. Gonna take S3 out and do some rollerblading. Yes I started rollerblading again, fell flat on my bum and hurt like crazy. But had the best time and picked it up in 2 seconds. I cant believe I ever stopped doing it. Wonder what other fun things I can do on the weekend??

W - 31
H - 33
Married - 7 years
Together - 10 yrs
Kids - S 3yrs old
Separated - 27/03/11
OW - 10/04/11