I'm still not really sure what sort of attitude I should have to W; should I initiate contact? Be casual about returning messages? Should I be expediting or resisting the D paperwork?
I would you should not initiate contact at this point. You should be casual about returning messages: don't ignore them, just don't be too overly eager to respond right away. As far as expediting or resisting the D, I suggest neither. Just don't resist it. Easier said than done. I have flat out told my W I don't want a D, but I've also told her I couldn't / wouldn't stop her. My DB coach gave me the tug-o-war analogy: when you drop the rope, she may just take a step back and stop pulling so hard against you. At that point, she may actually she what she's losing.
