[quote=ninelives]I also think that if you do somthing with sound logical motives and continue to do so. That eventually your heart will also be open to those ideals the emotional part will catch up with the logical part.
This re-caps the mantra I used about where the head goes, the heart will, eventually follow. If you know your course of action is the most likely to lead to a reconciliation AND OR simply a better you, and you KNOW this, eventually your heart will accept it.
So in our sitchs, if we continue to do the right thing with clear consistent actions, and she sees that it is logical to be with us the LBS, then she can fall in love with us again.
NO, the phrase "Where the head goes, the heart will follow" does NOT have anything to do with her. It's a self protective mantra that saves your heart from further turmoil b/c your heart listens to your head and your head will warn you of risky behaviors or mistreatment from another person, in order to save your heart...
Sure, your choice of behavior, may get her back a) but this is not a tactic aimed at that, specifically and b), her reaction is not relevant.
If she were a serial cheater and beat your child, badly, and you finally KNEW this, wouldn't your "feelings" be affected by what you now "KNOW" in your head? In that scenario, would you care if she were sad or wanted more alimony and blah blah blah or whatever? That, my friend, is letting your head lead your heart. Usually to a safer place based on the info you have at the time, which can change.
You would know your love for her was not a healthy option for you. At some point, your head telling you that she's a whack job with a nasty side, would sink in enough that your heart would realize it would be safer NOT to keep blindly following the emotion and instead would follow the head, telling itself "she's bad news"...and the heart wll thereby protect itself too. Does that help Denver?
You do your best "work" here and in your life and then, you leave the results up to HIM...
But does this all help you know what I meant?
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
