I'm still here

[25yearsmlc]

I read some of my first posts in this community and it has made me realize that some of my 180's are true 180's because I'm still doing them.
I said I was less angry, more grateful, and I still am. I'm proud of myself for that.

I realize also that I still obsess too much about my H and the state of our M and I really need to work on that.

Absolutely. Let's not worry about when he called last or how long it's been and whether he is thinking of you or not or feeling this way or that or thinks the sun is purple or blah blah blah...

Can you pretend he's in the Australian bush and is unavailable for 2 years? (unless he gets to the Satellite phone?)

I mean whatever works, imagery, perspective...you know the whole thing about how lucky you are compared to the rest of women in the world?

I mean that, it's not a cliche. We/You are lucky as heck. Why? B/C we live in a free nation, we vote and drive and work, we have food in our refrigerators, (we have refrigerators!), and there will be food in it tomorrow, we are healthy, and when we are not, we go to hospitals and doctors for care, our children are healthy and no one is raping them or dragging them off into their thug armies, we worship as we please, no one is shooting at us, or robbing us, or telling us that we no longer can leave our homes without a male chaperone. Though we may have troubles with our h, we have h's and know that they are not missing in action, have not had their arms or legs hacked off with machetes, we are not being hunted down for being in the wrong ethnic group, we are not going hungry. We are free. You know DG, every single problem mentioned in this paragraph is a present day problem for more than a billion women. IN fact, we are more fortunate than 99% of women in the world. So, now and then, it's a good idea to say thanks to Him.

If your h stays away and it means you are a single woman, so be it. I mean you are not the first woman to be left and you won't be the last.

I don't mean to sound like a beyYotch, but now and then you just have to snap out of it with some reality. The reality is, you're damn lucky to be here. You are on a computer now, getting and giving support to people who care about your problems and have faced something like it themselves. You are not alone.

(( ))